Found when packing

My feelings of being stressed-Written sometime in August, I found it as I was packing

The feeling of being stressed out makes me want to rage, run, and shout.

Screaming

"Why can't I manage all this stress?"

and

"Why did I let myself get so low to have my life be such a God Damn Mess?"

All I want is to be able to keep in the present, stop dwelling on the past, so that the cloud can be liftedand I can see the road to find a changed me

And

hope God will show me signs to find my true Destiny.

But right now all I keep asking God is to let me be...

To please stop giving me all the these tests

Because it is just making me feel run down and depressed

I hate feeling so anxious, irritable, and overwhelmed

When I am feeling like this my mind feels like it isin another realm.

But as I have been told God is only here to give you whatyou

"need"

not necessarily what you

"want"

Though it feels like these tradgedy's,

road blocks,

and tests are making the stress build a fight in my head

Where it's like these demons are there to scare me and taunt

Taunt me to make me afraid of what lies next

And

to keep me in my head where the crazy thoughts run

To keep making me think of the Pain I went through in the past that I regret but will never forget

Today I am truly trying to change my character defects

Keep in the day,

stay clean,

and learn coping skills

So that I can manage my life and have a strong will

And

I can live my life with the desire to survive

So that I can finally have the compelling feeling of being alive.